"It was an experience which left a deep impression and still. Difficult to describe but I will make an attempt. After drinking the Ayahuasca my journey went very deep and took a long time. At first I experienced an operation and healing of cells in my brain and head. A lot was being worked on. Still I am not aware what exactly happened. It felt like restoring and resetting. Later in the evening there was being worked on physical cleansing and detoxifying. Very special how in a short time a lot was being done on a physical and spiritual level. The hallucinations were quite fierce at times. I saw colors and shapes especially. The week after the effect troubled me. I was even more sensitive to everything I was already sensitive to, like work and traffic. The process and detoxifying went on. I perceived everything from a different level. Sometimes I am still communicating with the Ayahuasca, she feels like a reliable companion to me, and I am still asking questions. At the same time I notice a lot of physical changes like a softer skin and cleaner excrement. There is also more inner peace, because stress for example is a pattern to me and I sometimes find it difficult to release those rooted patterns myself and to tune in on the new me" Jeroen
"The experience was very special and really added something. What was special about the experience were the insights, positive energy and the fact that I can trust my body! I am glad I did the ceremony during the night. I would have experienced it in another way most probably if I did the ceremony during the day" Richard
"The beginning of the ceremony was fierce. Especially the process of surrendering to the medicine plant. After this the journey became beautiful and special. I have come to a certain understanding and I feel reset in a way. A wonderful experience that enriched me" Anonymous
"It was a special experience for me anyway to surrender to everything that is and everything that will be. The setting combined with Ayahuasca made it happen naturally. There is an enormous nice atmosphere in the room, there is a nice energy. And very nice that I could come over the night before the ceremony so that I had the opportunity to get acquainted. It was lovely for me to start the day with a stroll to be able to get into the experience. In my case it was also nice that I could stay another night as well despite the fact that I had not considered this :-) I felt supported by you the entire experience. You make contact in a lovely way and you feel warm and involved in everything you say or do" Esther
"The words that come to my mind: caring, connection, energy boost, touch, struggle, safety, good guidance" Roelof
"An intense experience, namely because of feeling nauseous and the sickness, which was obviously very much in the foreground. This made me very quiet while usually I am somebody who can go berserk with movement and voice etc. I was also surprised because of the connection with the chakras and what was happening with them. I am glad I did not take a second glass. This was more than enough! It was a journey on all levels. Physically, emotionally and mentally as well as energetically and spirtually. It was nice to have experienced it, but will I do it again? Your guidance was perfect, caring, you were present and loving, thank you. You let me in my process and you were always there" Frans Trepels
"In the beginning I felt much fear and a great pain in my heart, as if I was dying from a heart attack. I went into that. I felt much sorrow and also released it. I died several times, conceived (experienced a more or less dull making love ...) and reborn again, again and again I experienced not getting enough air, suffocating, strangled and dying. At the end again ... I sat and felt I was going to be beheaded, but this time I had nothing against it, I felt privileged. I felt in all this death and dying , pain and sorrow ... that something always is, consciousness, and this awareness grew stronger. A power that radiates ever stronger. This power distinguished ever stronger between real and unreal, radiated the unreal and more masks fell off, deeper fears became conscious, until in the deepest layers only fear in the form of fright remained ... stored fright in my cells (without content) and I could experience the fright consciously as something energetic in my body, that discharged itself and I was able to keep being present there. Keeping present with whatever sensations appeared proved to be the key to once again remain conscious and present, so not to end up in the unreal.
At one point I got to the faucet and the running water supported me. Grief from deeper layers flowed naturally out of me. And then this felt like a baptism. And there were other experiences. For example me remembering a family from a past life, who I had to let go but there was much love. Yes, the pain of letting go. Becoming aware we are all only temporarily here. Love and pain. About lovers we have to let go. But also the awareness that we are forms and behind those forms lies the spirit, who never was a form. I felt my grandma. First my feelings for her (heartbreak) and then I experienced het essence. What and where she is now. An experience of heaven. And I was here too! And I was or am in human form at the same time. My grandma did not and I realized my grandma's form does not exist anymore. Very moving.
Something peculiar took place: there was something like a radius in me who was always searching, a radius who projected the light and the power outside of me. And I was attracted to the light like a moth. Suddenly this light was not outside of me, but within me and it radiated in and from my chest! I myself was or am radiating. I felt this strong light soul power within me, who I am ... very sober and determined ... and this power, this light ... wants to radiate all ilusion and only wants to be free ... free from everything that is not real. At the end my attention was with the flowing of my body. Still light and energy radiated through my body" Mike Koertgen
"Everything is fluid. I already notice on the emotional side strong spurts. The mind is confused sometimes, does not know where to go, where I belong. I believe that a great time of change is pending. The Ayahuasca tea is a loving mother, which carries you through the ups and downs of your eternal self. When one surrenders to the Ayahuasca someone always gets the right thing. You have shown good leadership because you have a lot of experience" Anonymous
"It was a wonderful experience for me: a rollercoaster of special images and sensations which turned out to be very valuable to me and have given me the necessary insights for my life and spiritual path. The ceremonial space was nice, very attractive with a personal design and with a nice energy! I experienced your guidance as warm, experienced, caring and supporting. I feel you have received me very warmly with your own stories and experiences which were enthusiastic and making curious. You knew to deploy your expertise and knew when help and attention were needed and necessary. You combined it with a great sense and respect of my own space and privacy. I felt supported in my experience in every possible way: espcially the hand on my back during purging (vomiting) I appreciated very much. To me you are a shaman in the truest sense of the word!" Anonymous
"It was physically unpleasant, but I already thought beforehand that I survived a stomach flu, so I would surivive this as well ;-) I have the idea that I did not went into the experience that deep or that long. I can not compare it to something else of course. A few days later I felt a darkness was missing" Anonymous
"It was the most profound experience I ever had. I felt purified afterwards, immensely grateful, full of love and gratitude for life and the people around me. To be able to experience this together with my partner made it even more intense. A wonderful and magic experience.
My first reaction to the Ayahuasca was as if I took something sacred. I was very touched by it. The MAO inhibitors gave me hallucinations quite fast and I got a little scared. My body had a strong tendency to get rid of it. I threw up a lot. But I also had the feeling that it was realy necessary to spew hellfire and brimstone. I only took one glass, however a second glass could have deepened the experience most probably. But my body protested too much.
The images I saw were a bit pastel coloured, not that strong, but beautiful and clear. They did not show up the whole time, but with pauzes and then very quickly after each other. I found it difficult to remember the things I saw, but at the same time there was this message: 'you do not have to remember everything, actually you just have to go through the experience and let go'.
The images I saw dealt with pieces of past lives and they all felt into place, making connections, healing lives. Some lives in which I was interested especially I did not see or I saw them barely. This I found a pity. I also have the feeling I have to complete things (with regression or Ayahuasca). I also had contact with my recently deceased father. That was very healing! It felt like this was healing for more family ties as well. My question regarding the two men in my life was answered and did have consequences real fast. This is difficult to accomplish, but there is less doubt. Physical complaints also decreased through the Ayahuasca. This goes way deeper then any therapy and it realy originates from within oneself. It was a magical expeience. I have the feeling that a lot has happened, but the time was too short to solve everything. Thank you, dear Ruut for giving me this opporunity!" Alice
"It was a special experience that strengthened me. The journey I made during the ceremony is not easy to articulate. A lot of emotions has been released. And I saw myself for who I truly am. Before the ceremony I said that there was something within me, some kind of energy which does not flow and I can not interpret. I felt the energy within me and carried it along. After the second cup my journey began. At first it was difficult to let go of 'reality'. I asked two questions: Who am I? And what is it that is in me?
So my journey began. I saw a broken man hanging over his dead son who was in his twenties. Soon I found out I was that man. From that moment on I let go of this life and relived a previous life. No more 'that' man but I was that man. I was a father who mourned his dead child. The sadness and the energy that was released was so fierce as if I relived the entire process of grieving. Eventually I died a broken man who never got over the death of his son. I saw my previous life flash by but I was brought back to the moment my son was buried. It became clear to me that up to the day of the ceremony I did not process his death. I cried at his grave and it became clear I had to blow this unprocessed energy out of my nose. Then a dull feeling came over me. I was not finished yet!
Soon I found myself in yet another previous life and saw my daughter of about 9 to 10 years old. Long brown hair and a white dress. Her death I also did not process and the sorrow surfaced. Again I cried a lot and blew my nose (the snot had to get out because the unprocessed energy within me was attached to it). In fact i relived several lives in which I lost a child. A Mother in her thirties who lost a baby. An old fisherman's wife who lost her husband and only son during a storm at sea. It looked as if only unprocessed grief and pain was within me. It is now some time later and it has given me much answers why I feel and how I associate with people. My manners are now clear.
Beside all this I felt being touched and sometimes this felt enjoyable so that I had to laugh. For this I also received an explanation after the journey. To the question who I am I received an answer I did not expect. I am not who I thought I was, but I am a soul who has lived several lives with as much life lessons. The funny thing was I could relive the moment my present life began. This life stands for peace and quiet and I am allowed to enjoy it! I chose to be a man who likes men. No chance of children, no loss of children. Loosing loved ones always is always terrible, but loosing your own child I could not bear anymore! A far as I know this is my second life without children and I am allowed to enjoy life in all its beauty. It is difficult to put my journey into words because a lot of emotions were released but this is my journey I experienced during the ceremony" Anonymous
"It was a beautiful experience. The beauty of the journey I found that the Ayahuasca was very clear about how responsable I feel for a friend of mine. And that it is not necessary, because he is a grown man. This certainly made clear some entanglements. I also was allowed to experience my way of watching, as if I was able to look on another level, whereby it gotten real quiet. I think this journey prepared me for another journey, in which I am allowed to go even deeper, wherever that may take me. It has given me more confidence. Through getting more acquainted with Ayahuasca I am also curious how it will be to drink it during the night. The guidance was loving,and with respect and room for my own experiences. And supporting, especially when going to the toilet :-)" Anonymous
"In the beginning there were images flying over landscapes. That faded away. I received another half a glass and later again. I think I did not go deep into the experience, but I did have the feeling of being surrounded by love" Anonymous
"You were clear in your explanation. You gave and took enough time and space for questions and answers. During the ceremony you were very mindful! You give me a safe feeling and security. You guide well and pay attention when needed. Super. Beautiful choice of music as well. The music took me to beautiful places during the ceremony" Anonymous.
"It was a special journey in which all intended issues came by. A lesson in feeling and emotion. A lot of purifications took place which lasted beyond the weekend. It was special to experience the direct contact with grandmother Ayahuasca" Anonymous
"It was very special. Not real fun, but realy valuable. Up until today it keeps on processing. Very special to have been made clear that it is my turn now. Funny actually, because I now realise that I am being supported by ... who actually? ... but so it is. It was a long journey of about 8 hours. After 2 hours I thought it was enough. It did not start easy. Eventually a lot did happen. My whole body was shaking. You have helped me fine to continue. I discovered I could heal myself with my own hands. That still is the case, but the light I saw and extinguished while the shaking of my body diminished was no longer there for me to see. I am processing all this for a while and in the meantime a lot is happening" Anonymous
"I never heard of Ayahuasca before and I did not know what effect it would have on body and mind. Thanks to the security and expertise you radiate I dared to surrender to this marvelous JOURNEY!
I noticed that the experiences can be very different for anyone. With me there was mainly pleasure, joy and movement. I did not feel exaggerated tired and still I am amazed how much energy I received by which the moving of my body could take so long.
I also received some insights and every now and then I am still taken by it and come to new conclusions. I would prefer to go deeper into my 'essence', my 'being', consciousness or unconsciousness. That's why I would like to register another time for an Ayahuasca ceremony" Anonymous
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